Wednesday, April 13, 2005

It Ain't Over Till It's Over

People say, what can't kill you will make you strong. And my boyfriend once told me that, which I immediately answered with "yeah, but it can make you want to kill yourself voluntarily".
See,... this past week I've been having a pretty tough blow. I have to leave my job temporarily, until... well, to be honest, there is not definite answer for that. Though, the longest will be half a year.
I am not claiming to be a strong gal. But this blow did not bring me down. Why? I don't know.
Shocker?
YESSSS... for those who truly know me, I panicked pretty easily.
I told my boyfriend about the news, and he panicked. I had to calm him down. Then next stop was my mom & dad. Mom was okay, she's calm no matter what anyway (why didn't I get her gene on that department?). Dad was not as okay as mom. And ever since, trying to infuse me with a thousand ideas on how to survive here. I told him very nicely and very implicitly that I’m not listening to him.
I know I will survive. How? By breaking my piggy bank?
Nope. I’ll make it a surprise as for now. Just to build the suspense. He he he. And nope I’m not planning to sell drugs or be a pole dancer (I’m not bendy).
Then I told my best friends. Were they shocked too?
You betcha. But, I think my dad tops them all. Which on another subject makes me think to better-filter any bad news when it comes to my parents. I always thought I can tell them anything, no matter how bad the news is, they’ll be even stronger than I am. But I guess; now I need to start taking care of their mind well-being.
I told my roommate, I don’t think this kind of bumpy road is for everybody.
But that’s what makes my life colorful. Because it is not blunt. It’s not monotone, it’s not one color. It has some black spots on the pink. Purple on the orange… yuck… on the second thought, change the orange into lime green. I’m a bit phobic to any shades of bright orange. That color only looks good for veggies and fruits.
And so, I am announcing, shamelessly, that I’m jobless for a few months. And that I’m touched, that my boss and supervisor are waiting for me. And instead of getting someone new, they decided to wait up. And hire a temp.
And I have to say that my coworkers are very compassionate and supportive. For only the 2 and a half months that I was there, apparently they have considered me as part of their family.
I want them to know that, like wise.
As for now, the time away that I’ll be having, I’ll embrace it with joy & bravery. My glass is half full, not half empty.
And, yes my dear,…. Apparently you are right, what can’t kill you will make you strong. I hate to admit when you're right, but this time I’ll let you win.

-Id imperfectum manet dum confectum erit-

2 comments:

chocoholic said...

Hang in there, roomie!
I know you'll get thru this and make it just fine. Actually, I think you'll bounce right back with a mighty BLAST !

Crossing my fingers (and toes) for you, and keeping my eyes on your "coming-back" episode of this TRUE reality show,

^_^

Scal said...

Having know you for so long, I don't think that you're easily panicked. Yes... you freak out sometimes, but I never catch you in a situation where you need to be calmed down.

And from your story, you responded as usual, as stubborn as ever. Wait... let me think you as a pole dancer :D.

You've in much tough situation before in your personal life. Trust me, this one is nothing. And besides, with the big news.... you told me..... life is beautiful, eh?